Death by hunger in Khartoum

By Othman Fadl Allah

Yes, dont raise an eyebrow, my pious friend, who since I have known him, has always avoided the forbidden in his attire, drink, and food. He is meticulous to the point of strictness in that regard. He called me this morning, agitated, and his voice trembled as he said, for the first time, he would have a meal without knowing whether it is halal (permissible) or haram (forbidden). I asked him, knowing the extent of his sensitivity towards halal and haram: What happened, Yazool?

He began to narrate his suffering as one of those who circumstances have forced to stay in Khartoum, and these are extremely complicated conditions. Anyway, he started his story by saying:

Either we engage in suspicious activities or die of hunger. And if it were just me, I would be ready to die of hunger, but what about the girls, Othman?

And he continued: Life was not easy. We borrowed an amount that we thought we couldnt repay with our minds, but the mercy of Allah is vast. Sources and avenues for borrowing and assistance have dried up or, to be more accurate, there is nothing left to help anymore. Now, the affluent and the needy are on an equal line, all of them have become poor. The last amount we received was from my wifes brother, and it was ten thousand pounds. If we wanted to buy groceries with it, it might not be enough for even a single day, and as you know, we are a family of six, my wife, myself, and our four daughters. I thought, then I calculated, and I decided, and I ask Allah for forgiveness, but it is a dire need.

I took the ten thousand pounds and went to the black market. I bought goods that would last us for a few days. By Allah, Othman, after I finished the purchase, without realizing it, I broke down and entered a hysterical crying fit that made several people in the market gather around me. Some of them thought that what I bought would not be enough, so they volunteered to buy more goods. I swear what Im telling you, the truth is, some of those I bought from returned the money to me and vowed not to take it back.

I returned home with goods that would last us for two weeks and five thousand pounds. I know that these goods are stolen, and I know that buying them is forbidden, but what should I do? I dont know if my Lord will forgive me or punish me. I dont know if what will enter the stomachs of my daughters, whom I have raised on halal, will lead them to paradise or if it is halal or haram.

And he concluded, Othman, I entrust you with a responsibility, work as much as you can so that this war stops.